Leading with Power & Purpose

130. The Power of Vulnerability: Building Trust and Influence as a Leader

September 18, 2024 Sabine Gedeon Season 6 Episode 130

Do you feel like you’re chasing a career that is not aligned with your true passion? What if the key to rediscovering your true path was as simple as sitting silently for five minutes daily? 

In this episode of the Leading with Power & Purpose Podcast, Sabine speaks with Loree Philip about authenticity in leadership and women reclaiming power, authority, and influence. During the pandemic, Loree had a pivotal realization that her corporate career no longer brought fulfillment. This moment sparked her transition to becoming the CEO of WeSpark and the Daring to Leap podcast host, where she empowers women to overcome fear and self-doubt, helping them build authentic, fulfilling careers.

Listen in to learn how to intentionally practice self-care and mindfulness to unlock potential, improve confidence, and transform your leadership style. You will also learn how you, as a woman leader, can support new or younger leaders by sharing your struggles and modeling vulnerability.

Key Takeaways:

  • How to embrace your authentic leadership style and move away from traditional male-dominated power dynamics.
  • The importance of self-empowerment, building relationships, and cultivating trust to create influence.
  • The importance of creating space to check-in with yourself and having intentional self-care practices.
  • How to practice the mirror exercise to deepen self-love and self-awareness.
  • How modeling vulnerability and sharing past struggles aids leaders in supporting new or younger leaders.
  • The importance of being present and embracing the power of the current moment.

What You Will Learn in This Episode:

  • [01:45] Loree’s career journey at Boeing and her transition through different roles to keep learning and growing.
  • [03:05] A pivotal moment during the pandemic when Lori reevaluated her career and realized it no longer aligned with her passion.
  • [10:45] Definitions of power, authority, and influence and how they show up in corporate settings.
  • [16:18] How women can embrace authentic leadership styles by focusing on self-empowerment over external validation.
  • [25:31] How she spent most of her career focusing on others and found it uncomfortable to turn the spotlight on herself.
  • [27:00] Simple practices to adopt to intentionally take control of your day, tap into yourself, and boost your confidence.
  • [30:36] The powerful mirror exercise – stare into your eyes and declare love to yourself for 30 days.
  • [35:45] How women can support each other in leadership and make new leaders feel comfortable and empowered.

Connect with Loree:

Book Recommendation:

  • The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle

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HOST INFO:

Sabine Gedeon is a dynamic force in the world of leadership and personal development. As the Founder of Transformed Leadership Institute and CEO of Gedeon Enterprises, Sabine leverages nearly 20 years of experience to guide clients in both startups and Fortune 500 companies. Her unique approach combines human-centered principles with tech-enabled solutions, delivering customized programs for leaders at all levels to tackle crucial leadership and talent development challenges.

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ADDITIONAL SUPPORT:

Download Free Resources - https://sabinegedeon/gifts
Get Coaching Support: https://meetwithsabine.as.me/Discovery

Are you tired of playing small and ready to step confidently into your greatness and share your unique brilliance with the world? Well, you're in the right place. I'm your host, Sabine Gideon, and I've dedicated nearly two decades empowering individuals and leaders as they confidently navigate the twists and turns of life and career transitions. If you're seeking direction, connection, or just a little push to play bigger, consider this podcast, your VIP path to a community that genuinely understands your journey. Join me every week for candid conversations and practical guidance designed to help you navigate the challenges of life and business, foster a growth mindset and cultivate meaningful connections. It's time to embrace your inherent power, define your unique purpose and prosper in every aspect of your life. Let's get started.

Sabine:

Hello and welcome to another episode I'm your host Sabine Gideon, and I'm excited to bring you another female powerhouse interview on women and power. So if you are completely new to me, welcome. Thank you for tuning in this week. So I'm going to introduce our guests. Today, Ms. Lori Phillip. Lori is passionate about helping women build confidence and let go of the fears and doubts, holding them back so they can have the careers and lives they really want and deserve. Lori is a former 16 year Boeing professional turned entrepreneur who followed her heart to have more freedom and impact in her career. She now serves as an executive coach, the host of the top rated daring to leap podcast. And the founder and CEO of WeSpark, a boutique coaching and training firm for women. With that, welcome to the show, Lori.

Loree Phillip:

Ah, thank you so much Sabine. It's so great to be here.

Sabine:

Same here. Same here. I'm excited. And for those of you who are tuning in, you missed out on a powerful conversation in the green room that I'm sure will continue. Um, but I, I, I love when things start off like that, where there's, um, there's enough, uh, Traction in terms of our passion and what we're going to talk about so that we can bring you, um, you know, some really, really great content. So I read your, your bio briefly, but I know that there's so much more to you than that. If you would, you know, briefly walk us through your, your career journey and specifically what have been some of the career catalysts or milestones that have helped you navigate corporate America, and then certainly stepping out on your own in your own business.

Loree Phillip:

Yeah. Thank you for the question. Um, as you mentioned in my bio, I spent 16 years at Boeing. So it was my first job fresh out of college. And I got a finance degree at Arizona state and I went in straight into Boeing. And I really did what you just described in terms of moving up the corporate ladder. I started out in finance. I moved into program management after I got my MBA. And then I was in the strategy organization, um, after that for nine years. And one of the catalysts I would say for me. Um, was just really my love of learning, love of trying something new. And so I moved around a lot, not physically, but within, um, big companies, you can really do a lot with your career. You don't have to stay in one function. You don't have to stay in one position. You can stretch out and try different things. And that's what I really loved about the environment I worked in was that I could. Test out this, this type of position. And then when I got bored of that, go try something else. And so that's what I did really was continuously learning, growing, trying different things while I was there until, and I'll just say that until COVID and I'll just tell you briefly. After just hearing what I said, I was very passionate about my career at Boeing, and I probably would have been there for 30 plus years because that's what you do when you work for a big fortune 50 company that people's like dads work there for their whole careers and generations and things like that. And I had not even thought. About leaving and doing something else. But when COVID hit and I was spending a lot more time working virtually, working at home, and there was this really interesting extra distance and space I had away from the office. the day to day that really helped me get more clarity and see the bigger picture. And I was in this meeting standard, uh, Webex call with the team. And for some reason, this particular day, I looked at it and it was almost like this out of body experience where it. I was listening to it from a higher perspective and I could see it for what it was worth. So all of a sudden I saw it and I thought there was, we were talking about just. Same stuff. Same problems. We always talk about again and again, nothing's never changing that I'm listening. And I'm hearing people just talking to sound smart, you know, positioning, um, within the team and positioning for power and I'm listening. And I'm like, you know, what people because of COVID are starting, we're concerned about their health, concerned about their families and what matters in life. And what doesn't matter in life. Hit me like a, you know, a brick. It was just like, okay, all of a sudden my career stopped mattering to me. It, it, it felt, it felt meaningless in the moment and I know it wasn't meaningless, but all of a sudden I had this window open, like this, this poking a hole into my thoughts around. Is this what I want to be doing for another 15 years? And the answer was no. And at that point, I didn't know what I wanted to do because I hadn't thought about it before, but it was that opening. And then it was that seed that planted that just wouldn't go away. Um, because from there, it just kept coming back up. And so I started to pay attention to it. And so that's what started my journey into figuring out my passions, my strengths. Like if I had a blank piece of paper, What kind of career would I create for myself and going through that process with a coach and defining that led me to feel comfortable and confident enough to leave what was a very stable, secure 16 year career that a lot of people were like. What are you doing? You know, like, are you sure? Kind of thinking. So, so that's what happened. And, um, I left last July. Oh, wow. So it's been a little over a year.

Sabine:

Okay. So you are, you're, I can't, I don't know if you're officially part of the great resignation, but definitely, uh, within that bucket of people taking that time to really, um, to self assess. And it's funny as you were talking. I knew you worked at Boeing, um, but I didn't realize how similar our, our callings out had been. Um, so for me, it was while I was working, uh, at United Technologies, which is now Raytheon Technologies, which is a competitor, uh, to Boeing. So to your point, same thing, like you could easily Either get lost or, you know, transition, however, however you wanted. And I remember I was, uh, in a rotation program and by the second rotation, I was in this role and literally in the office 7 30 in the morning, uh, not leaving until 6 37, seven o'clock at night. And it was day after day, after day, after day, to the point of. I think that's the first time I realized that I was experiencing burnout. And I remember just sitting there similar to you. I'm sitting in a meeting and it's just like, I'm, I'm looking at this point. I was kind of like looking at everyone and it was just like, I can't do this. Like, I, I can't do this. Like, if this is, if this is what climbing the ladder requires. I don't, I don't want it anymore. And at that point, it was just, it was, it was scary, but it was also liberating, right? It's, it's scary when you can look at your situation that you're currently in and kind of say, I don't want this anymore, but not know. Well, what is it that you want? Um, that was the part that kind of, you know, that, and I'm glad that you got a coach. I ended up getting a coach, but it was more to start the business. Um, but that, that is a real thing where I think a lot of us experience that. And there are probably been other times where we had experienced something similar, maybe not to that extent, but it was easier to. Ignore and, or, you know, go into our justifications of, yeah, well, that might be nice to, to leave and start that thing, but, you know, I have bills. I have this, I have that. So I say all that to say, you know, uh, kudos to you for. You know, taking that experience and really leaning into it and doing the work and gaining the clarity so that now you're in this space where you are supporting women who not necessarily are just looking to leave corporate, but who are looking to advance, looking to grow. so yes, let's get into this power. And I have questions and I want to go back to something that you said about that meeting, that pivotal meeting for you, where you are observing people positioning for power. Um, cause I, I, okay, I won't spoil it. We'll, we'll go back to that. So We've been talking about women in power and really breaking down some of the, the myths around, you know, power, maybe not even myths, but some of the mental barriers, some of the societal barriers. Um, how do we define, you know, different power dynamics? How do we engage? In certain power dynamics and really get to a place where we own our own power and feel comfortable, confident enough to stand in and say, I am a powerful woman. Um, and then proceed to behave as such. So I've been asking guests, uh, you know, what their definitions are on three words, power. Authority and influence and how those three words specifically based on their definitions have shown up for them. Of course, there are no right or wrong answers because everyone's answer has been, you know, completely different. Some similarities. Um, but I think the beauty in this is that, you know, the more you can start to see or hear how others define it. Right. That might help spark for those who are listening. Um, the, the inspiration to start to define it for themselves and then examine how that definition is either serving them or how it's restricting them. And if, and, and how they might want to make, or they might want to adopt a different definition based on who they are today. So with that, with that setup, um, I'm curious, Lori, how do you define the three? Power, authority, and influence and how does it show up for you or how have they shown up

Loree Phillip:

for you? Yeah, I really love this conversation, Sabine, and just that we're taking the time to really dive in this deep on a topic and terminology and how it applies. And I will start with power because I think that, and I don't know if this is true, but when you think about the word power, you might think about somebody who's powerful, somebody who's in a position of power, something external where somebody granted you. So being you now have the power to run this team, you know, but when I think about power for myself, and this is shifted for me over time, I think about self empowerment, the power that I can control within myself. And. We are limiting ourselves in so much because I've been expanding this and thinking about, okay, what kind of powers do I have, right? Where, where did I think that I didn't have power, but in actuality I did, but I did not allow myself. That power. And so for the from the power side, my definition would be that the self empowerment we have within our control to show up to decide to be a good listener to give somebody your attention to, you know, there's there's so many things. And I don't know if, um You've seen one of these charts. I've seen them on like Instagram, a visual of, okay, what's in your control and what's outside of your control, right? And then they list, okay, your attitude is in your control, your thoughts, your this, your that, whatever. And then outside of your control is the outside environment. And so for me, that power piece is all that stuff in that, in your control bucket. And then for, um, the next one was authority, right? Authority. So to me, authority is more formal. This is positional power. This is, um, for me, my definition is I have authority within That was given to me because I am the leader of this team, or I have responsibility over this project, or I have decision making authority on this contract, or, you know, it's it's I have permission within my organization within my company to make a decision in a particular way to. Decide how I want to structure my team, things like that. So to me, that's what authority is. And then as far as influence goes for me, this is a person's ability to impact other people in how they act. And I, I'll kind of, um, reorganize my thoughts on that, but it's, you know, when you have influence, where it's different from positional authority. Is. Use of being don't have to be on my team, but because we have a rapport, because we have a relationship, because you care what I have to say, I can come to you and explain to you why I think you should do X, Y, Z, and you might actually do it. And that's influence, because I don't have to be your boss. To do that, right? I don't have to have direct authority over giving you an assignment, but when you have influence, you're able to cultivate relationships in such a way and build that trust and rapport to have people really hear your ideas. and actually listen enough that they might do what you're asking them to do or shift directions than what they were originally thinking about. To me, that is influence. So that's impact through relationships. With another person. Love it.

Sabine:

I love it. So I want to, um, so to summarize based on what I wrote down, cause you shared so many great nuggets here. So from a power perspective, that's really about self empowerment. So that comes from within, uh, we are in agreement with that. And then the formal or the authority is a little bit more formal. It is what is bestowed upon us, or we are given permission to exercise authority. So that is very much. Um, while we may have it, it's an external source versus power being an internal source and then influence being almost like the demonstration or the manifestation of, you know, our ability to impact whether we're using, um, our, our power from an internal source or we're, we're using our authority from an external source. Um, the influence is like the, the effect, if you will, or our ability or effectiveness is, is. Yeah, our ability to effectively influence is almost the result of the use of either one of those. Is that, is that accurate?

Loree Phillip:

Yeah. Yeah. I think that's accurate. And, um, when I was, you know, sometimes We don't really know what we think about a term until we start talking about it. So as I was talking about it, um, you know, the piece that I would just add into what you just laid out for influence is it does, um, seem to me that what's really important there is. Um, through relationship or through, through trust, I think it's really trust, you know, that you can really influence somebody to do something that you feel like is the right thing to do, whatever it is that you're trying to influence somebody. And so that, I mean, there is a personal power piece to that, but there's also this, um, Credibility and over time building in relationships and in showing up and, and, you know, having this, um, relationship with somebody that, that, that really does do a lot for influence.

Sabine:

Yeah, thank you for adding that on and also I want to acknowledge what you said in terms of, it's not until you have to like think about something like the terminology and like really talk it out till you. You start to work through it yourself. And, and I think you just demonstrated the exactly what I, I want to come out of this, uh, series is that people start doing just that, like, what do I believe about these things? Um, you know, where have I seen them exercise and I assigned a good meaning to it, or, you know, I've never even thought about it. Um, because the truth is it's, it's, you know, with it's. Especially with power, that's something that we're introduced to when we're two, right? So our most, most two year olds first word, or maybe the second word is no, no, no, right? Like that is when we get introduced to, or we start experimenting. With our own personal power and based on the, uh, the reaction of our parents, our caretakers, you know, we give it a particular meaning, um, and especially authority, right. Depending on the household that you were brought up in, right. Who was the authoritarian in the house? Right. And how did that show up? And. You know, what meaning did you give to authority based on those earlier relationships? And so I think it's, it's important for us to really start examining this. Cause if we're ever going to get to a place where we own our power, we own our voice, we own our influence and our authority, we have to know what it is. And we have to really assess. Do I still have some, um, some negative meaning attached to authority? Because I do think you need authority to exercise influence, to exercise power in any capacity. We still need authority. Now how we demonstrate that authority, that's what distinguishes whether or not it's really that we're influencing people because we've built the relationship, we've built the trust or we're just controlling and manipulating and dominating because

Loree Phillip:

I. I said, so kind of thing, you know, parents that do because I said, so

Sabine:

exactly, exactly. And I think the beauty in this too, um, I don't want to lose this thought is that we men, women, we, we all have this inherent source of power. It's the way that it's demonstrated. That is really the differentiation. And for many of us, we've seen, especially in the society that we live in right now, that that's very much male dominated. It's about power over. Whereas for us women, the way that we naturally exercise our power is power with, and that's really what influence is. I feel like there needs to be a balance, or there can be a balance, where the men get to exercise it as power over, we get to exercise it as power with. But we aren't afraid of that power over model. We aren't afraid or we aren't reluctant to step into, you know, our different forms

Loree Phillip:

Yeah. Yeah. The, what came up for me when you were just talking about that is, um, you know, part of the, um, I don't want to say problem, but when you look at the male dominated environment that most of us work in and a lot of the big corporations is that. The, the models of leaders. because mostly our men are showing one kind of authority and power demonstration, influence demonstration. And we don't get to see another example that actually would feel more in alignment with the way that we would like to lead as women. And, and that is, that can be a problem because when we decide to step into Okay, my role models, because this is all I have to work with, are these. Men and I'm not saying it's a bad example. It's just not a, um, natural example for everyone. And so when you try to step in and model their behavior, it doesn't come out as, as, as well, because it is not your natural gifts. It's not your natural way of approaching it. You're not, you're going to feel icky because that's not how you would. Like to actually talk to people or whatever the example is. And so I love this idea and we can continue. Um, we'll leave this tangent, I'm sure, but I would just like to offer that at some point we can choose to be in our power, to align with our authentic way of leading. And even if we don't have those examples, we can become the examples for other women, um, and show up the We feel naturally authentically able to show up so that others can see, Hey, you know what Sabine, her leadership style is different, but you know what, I really like it. There's something about it that really resonates with me. And then, you know, it can. Spread from there. We can be those examples and other people can, can take that and, and have those role models and representation for themselves to feel like they can bring themselves forward in a leadership capacity.

Sabine:

Yeah, I, I totally agree with you. And I think the, the power in us demonstrating our power really just goes back to where we sourcing it from. If we're sourcing it from within, it is authentic. It is true. There's nothing that we need to do. We're just showing up as ourselves and that's what people are going to be attracted to. And that's what gives us the permission to influence them. But when we are sourcing, you know, power based on authority that someone else gave us or a model that we've seen that does not resonate with us, then people are naturally repelled by that. I truly believe that. Oh,

Loree Phillip:

go ahead. No, no, I was just agreeing with you. It, and that's, that's What you just said is so important because even though that's what that's the way that other people may have. It might work for other people. Right. And so you see that you say, well, he, he was able to really get his promotion or lead that bigger team. And it seems to work for him. The problem is, is that when I step in and try to lead that way, it will fall flat. And not only will I, um, get lost in the crowd, I'm not going to stand out as a leader trying to replicate somebody else. I will get lost in the crowd and my, my brilliance won't come out. Because to your point, I'm using external references in the way I'm acting and not just tapping into my natural way of being and my natural brilliance to come out. And that's where. You will stand out as a leader, as a role model, as an employee, a professional, whatever position you might have.

Sabine:

Yeah, I totally agree. Um, there was something I was going to say, but I probably, it's probably a good thing that I've lost it because we would have stayed on this, uh, for a while, but yeah, but if it comes, if it comes back to me, I will not hesitate to bring it back up. Um, so with that, as we've been talking about, you know, power really being, um, or our philosophies being aligned, that power is really internal. Um, it, it, it's, it's like any other power source, right? Like, or I should say like any power source, like you need something to plug it in. So while we may be clear. On where our power comes from, there is a responsibility to be intentional on a regular basis to tap into that power source. So I'm curious what, what routines, what practices have you put in place to help you maintain your own personal power and, you know, stay grounded in who you are.

Loree Phillip:

This is such a good question. Sabine. Um, so for me, I would say most of my career, I was not intentional about this exact thing. Um, and for that reason, I didn't really know myself well enough to know how to authentically put myself out there. There is this piece of light. And I had this conversation recently where it came to me. If you want to be seen, You have to see yourself first. You have to know who you are, right? And I didn't get this at all. I spent most of my career in my life. Focusing my energy on other people, on my relationships, on my family, on other people and turning the spotlight back on to me was so uncomfortable, so uncomfortable. I just didn't know how to do it. And I would sit in the, in like the leadership discussions and meetings where we're supposed to be growing ourselves. And the T the, the instructor would say, okay, spend five minutes reflecting on what you've learned today. And I would roll my eyes and be like. You know, like this is a waste of my time, right? And here I am as a coach now, realizing how important it is for us to take that time to charge our batteries, to know who we are, to do that. And I will say, so for me, my practices, I started out doing, um, just five minutes of, of quiet meditation, nothing, nothing fancy, just sitting by myself. For five minutes in silence, and I would just put a little timer and just start to notice what I notice, see what thoughts came up, let them go, you know, just be in the moment. And what was really interesting at the time, I remember talking to somebody who was asking me. Um, about my presentation skills and she was like, yeah, you seem pretty comfortable up there and I will say I was not that comfortable, but she seemed to think that and I said, you know what, ever since I've been doing my meditations, I have felt more confident for some reason and I didn't have the, um, research or anything. It was just the way I felt is I was spending this time just alone by myself. Daily and somehow that came through in the way I was showing up every day and I still don't know all the science behind it, but I will say it definitely worked for me. So I've actually grown that to now. I do 20 minutes a day. Of meditation and it's not always silent. Sometimes I'll do a guided, uh, meditations and you can find those all over the internet for free or calm app or whatever you use or you like to do, but. You know, when we're so busy in the, especially in this digital age where there's the information economy, things are coming at us all the time, like, um, notifications on your phone, emails popping in, meetings to be had, and you're just going from thing to thing to thing. You don't have a moment. Just, just check in with yourself. How are you doing? Uh, what's actually, even though I have a full list today to step back and say to yourself, well, what out of all the stuff I'm supposed to do today is the most important and actually what are the things I should be doing that I'm not, you know, and, and taking control of. Your, and this is in your power, right? Taking control of your day from that perspective. And it all starts with creating space in your day to do that. So that, that's what I try to do. It's not always perfect. Um, I don't, I try to do it every day. It doesn't always happen. But the beauty is, is you just start kind of creating that space every day. And if you miss it, it's okay. And start again the next day.

Sabine:

Yeah. Thank you for sharing that. So I'm hearing. Very, very intentional. Um, and really, really tapping into self. I, I think for all of us listening, it's. No one's thinking about themselves. Right? Unless it's kind of like your, your stomach starts growling, you're like, oh, I'm hungry. Or, you know, something to that effect. I haven't been outside. Mm-Hmm. Um, but in those few moments of just saying, okay, how do you feel? How do you feel? Mm-Hmm. Or one question that I'm also gonna incorporate is, what do you need right now? Mm-Hmm. what do you need right now? Um, so thank you for sharing that. Um, I did remember my other question, but I, I will have to go back to what you said in order to be seen. You have to first see yourself like that is so powerful that I hopefully if you are listening that you go back and you listen to that because that is so true. And what that sparked for me was. There's an exercise that I assign my clients to do, and oftentimes, the ones that I assign this for is the ones who can't see themselves. The ones who can't see their greatness and they're struggling to see it and they believe that it's in their job or they believe that it's in the next in the next title or let me get to the next place. And really it's a simple exercise and it drives them nuts but it gets results so we're going with that. I have them stare in the mirror like we do either it's going to be a 30 day 15 day whatever the time frame that I think they can handle and commit to. But every morning, first thing after they brush your teeth, they watch your face. I want you to stare into the mirror. I want you to look dead in your eyes, not at the pimple, not at the wrinkles, not at anything else, but stare into your eyes. And tell yourself you love yourself 10 times. So that would be, Sabine, I love you. Sabine, I love you. And you don't, like, you know, if you find yourself looking away, look right back at yourself. And the, the feedback that I've gotten from clients, right, like, Some day, some of them, it's like, Oh, I completely started to ball others. It's like, Oh my gosh, this is so uncomfortable. I don't like looking at myself. Right. And some others, it was just like, Oh, okay. Well, you know, it was kind of cool. And they're so detached from it. But as time goes on, Emotions start to come up. And so I, I share that to share, especially for those of you who are listening. If, if you, you know, put, if you caught what Lori said, in order to be seen, you have to first see yourself. It doesn't matter whether or not you're being seen on video every week, like we are right. This is to be seen by the people who are in your house, the people who are on the job with you, your clients, if you're running a business, right. Or prospective clients, whatever it is. First, see yourself. And that's just one exercise that, you know, I, I help support clients to do that. Do you have one that you want to share and put out there as well?

Loree Phillip:

I was, I got chills when you ran through that exercise. I love it so much. So being, and I can imagine how powerful that could be for somebody. Um, so I don't want to water it down. I think if you're listening, do Sabine's exercise. And I would not be surprised if that creates a big difference for you. Oh,

Sabine:

it does. I, I, I was my first client and the tears that I cried.

Loree Phillip:

I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it this weekend. I'm going to try it out. I've never done that before.

Sabine:

I love it. So set you, I would encourage you to set the amount of dates that you're going to commit to doing it. Right. Cause doing it one time like that experience will be like, Oh my gosh. But set to do it out for a period of time. Um, I recommend 30 days, but I know sometimes people's, uh, attention spans doesn't work that way. But at least, at the very least, two weeks. Two solid

Loree Phillip:

weeks. Two weeks. Yes. And how many times? 10

Sabine:

times. For how long? 10 times. Yep. And you're, you have to say, I love you, Lori, um, versus just saying, I love you. I love that's awkward, but it's really, I love you and you sit in that. I love you. And you sit in that. Cool. I'm excited. I'm excited for the follow up on, on how that exercise works. I'm going to

Loree Phillip:

be crying, everybody, just so you

Sabine:

know. They're going to be tears, tears that needed to be released and, and what we all want to be told we're loved. So what greater gift can we give ourselves than to tell ourselves that we love each ourselves each day? Um, so for those of you who are listening, who decide to join lawyer on this exercise, please send me an email. Let me know how that experience is for you. Yeah. Awesome. Okay. So one more question for you as we're thinking about, well, a couple more questions, but as it relates to power, as we're thinking about, you know, all of the societal, uh, things that are happening, we know that we, you know, it's been a journey for us to come to this space. And I also, you know, I'm a firm believer that success leaves clues. And that we as leaders have a responsibility that, you know, once we've overcome something that we turn around and we either let down the ladder, or we sprinkle the breadcrumbs, so that the young women who are coming up behind us have some type of pathway to go down for themselves. So as it relates to, you know, navigating power dynamics, um, within, you know, the, within corporate, within life, you name it. What advice would you give, uh, to those who are in leadership positions now to help support in making that, that trek, if you will, a little less tumultuous for the young women who are coming up?

Loree Phillip:

Yeah, this is a really great question and a couple things came to mind. One is We talked a bit about how powerful modeling can be, so I'm going to ask listeners who are in those leadership position to allow yourself to be more vulnerable and to share through story, the hard times, the things you overcame, the things that you had to push through so that others can hear it and know that, you know what? I'm dealing with this right now and I can get through it too because we learn and we get inspired so much through another person's story through if it's real, if it's authentic, right? And so by opening up and being more vulnerable in your journey. That is one thing I would say right off the bat, start talking about humanize yourself so that others can see themselves in you and can start to see, okay, you know what, the path is not going to be super easy, but this is, you know, this isn't just me that's having a hard time. I'm not alone, you know, and, and then showing, Yourself in that way will certainly inspire and help give clues and breadcrumbs to use your word for others to follow. So I think that's one, the other one that comes to mind. And I had this conversation recently on the topic of imposter syndrome. And one of the things I think we can do as leaders. Is to help others feel comfortable, especially newer leaders, newer employees or newer people into a certain environment. When I walk into a room and say it's a meeting, And I'm one of the only women coming in. I've never been in this meeting before. I don't really have that title yet, or maybe I do, but I don't know if I feel like I deserve it. Whatever it is, right? I'm stepping into this environment feeling like I don't belong. We can help. If you've been in that room, if you're in that room, even if you're the only one, you can help that other. Woman feel comfortable, invite her to sit next to you, tell her after the meeting, you do belong here next time, sit at the table, tell her that when you came to this meeting for the first time, you felt uncomfortable. And you know what? There was so much value in having yourself there. And you know that she can too. And so these are things we can do to help pull other people in and help them feel comfortable so that they can. not withhold their thinking, not withhold their ideas and get out of their own way and show up in these environments.

Sabine:

Oh, I love that. So many practical nuggets. And I think the beauty of that is. It's us taking ownership, right? We don't have to wait till someone comes and says, Hey, I really felt uncomfortable there. Like, can you give me a word of encouragement? Right. But it's recognizing where were you when that was your first time doing X and what word of encouragement can you share with someone? And also that, that piece about sharing your struggles. Like I, I've. Every leader that I've ever been drawn to, um, I've always wondered regardless of who they were, my, my, my instinct was always like, I want to know what their story is. Right. I always wanted to know what their story because I know that for anybody that we consider to be great, they had to have a, they, they were on a journey before they became great. So I'm always curious about what that story is. Um, and even gain more admiration and inspiration from them. When I learn, you know, that it wasn't always peaches and gravy because My, my story isn't peaches and gravy, so I can't relate to someone who, you know, like the star, the stars in the moon, like rise and fall, you know, at the B at their birth and all that other stuff. Like that just wasn't my reality. Um, so I love that you shared that. So going into the blitz session here, three questions. Two minutes. Try to keep it into two. I'm going to, I'm going to try to keep it into two minutes. All right. I haven't been getting

Loree Phillip:

ready in my chair for this.

Sabine:

So as you think about, you know, all of the lessons that you've learned, both through your career at Boeing as an entrepreneur and just in life in general, if you could go back to a younger version of Lori and give her some critical piece of advice that you think would have been a game changer for her. What might that be?

Loree Phillip:

Hmm. Yeah. I have, I have two things and one of them I already mentioned to you before and when this question came to me, um, it was asked, you know, what would I tell my 21-year-old self? And what came to me, and I almost started crying in the moment, I hope I don't do it now, um, is to tell her. You are more powerful than you think you are. And that when I was 21, I remember thinking, you know, I just didn't really have that confidence yet, you know, and I, we're all working on that. It's a journey. Um, But I was a bit lost and I was going through a lot and we, we just talked about power and we have so much more power than we think we do. So just tap into that, spend time with that, feel that out for you. And the other one is to give yourself more grace. We are so hard on ourselves. And life is not a cakewalk. We were just talking about that. Things come up and you're human and it's okay. And just this, it's okay. And we live to see another day, but don't be so hard on yourself. There's so many critical people in the world. Don't be that person for yourself. Yes. I

Sabine:

love that. I love that. And then as you look ahead, right? So as you've stepped into this place of purpose, you are driving towards your life's mission in supporting women, empowering women, helping them tap into their own power. If we fast forward 60, 70, however many years from now, and you're looking back at your life, you were looking back at the impact that you've made. What do you want the narrative to

Loree Phillip:

be? I want the narrative to be, and you know what's funny is I had a coach ask me this question when I was going through this process and I came up with a big fat blank. I could not see myself that far in advance and see this. Legacy or this discussion about me. And part of it is I don't like the spotlight to being on me. So my instinct was to say, I want my legacy to be about all the people that I helped out, right. That women are out there choosing to listen to what they actually want and to. Stop worrying about what they feel like they should want, and that, that right there, if, if people would just take those moments in their day to check in with themselves, to understand what they really want, and then take action towards it, that would be enough for me. Um, so my legacy in 60 years from now, uh, for myself, cause I, I am getting to a place that I'm ready to want things for myself and not just project onto other people is I want, and I guess this is it. I want my, my kids. To see that you can go for what you want and be happy in your career and be successful. And it's not, you can either be successful, but not happy, or just you could be happy, but not successful, but you can have both. And it comes from a place of going for your dreams and giving it a shot. Oh,

Sabine:

I love. Oh, okay. I'm, I'm, I'm not gonna, uh, belabor this, but I absolutely love. The fact that you, you shifted your own narrative in deciding that the legacy was going to be about you. Yes. Even as you live out this legacy, it is helping others. It is supporting others. It is benefiting others. It'll benefit your kids and their kids and everyone else and every other woman that you touch. But the fact that like you tapped in and you said, I want this to be about me. Um, I think that is powerful. Uh, sadly, I have to say that's courageous in the sense that, you know, not many of us. Think about it in that sense of like, what will this mean for me? It is very much that word legacy puts it out there that it has to be about other people. So kudos to you for taking back your power and taking in the reins and saying, no, no, no, no, no. My legacy is going to be about me. It'll benefit other people, but it's going to be about me. That's awesome. Yeah.

Loree Phillip:

And I'll just say I'm not 100 percent there yet, but what's cool about growth is I can see myself getting closer to being able to declare that.

Sabine:

Yeah. I love that. I love that. And then lastly, as far as books go or a book that has been pivotal for you in your growth, either personally or professional, uh, which, what recommendation do you have for us?

Loree Phillip:

Yeah. So this one for me, and I can almost remember, I don't remember the day I read it or the set of days I read it, but I remember the time period and where, where I lived and everything, because it was so powerful for me and it was the power of now by Eckhart Tolle. And, um, I know the book itself has a spiritual lens to it. If you just take it on its merit of, I, there was something in there that shifted for me about just how powerful it is now, in this exact moment, in this moment I'm talking to you Sabine, this is where life happens, and there was a quote, and I'm gonna mess up the quote, but the general idea of it was, That life happens now and that the past is a memory of now and the future is anticipation of now's. And so, but, but life is now and the only way that we will ever. Change or grow or learn or actually do what we want to do is in this moment in each moment and and that really like sunk in for me and I remember thinking, wow, I'm a new person after letting this sink in and I haven't it's not like I read the book or anything but in that moment there was something there that I really got out of it that changed a lot for me. Oh,

Sabine:

okay. Definitely adding that to the show notes and to my audible list, I, I think I have a couple of his books in my audible that I just have not gotten yet to but it's, it's funny that you say that and I won't belabor this but it's, it's that word has been in my spirit consistently and even in my, like, affirmations and my declarations right it's been about. What's happening right now, like in this moment, this is, this is what I have. And to be present, uh, you know, I used to hear people say that it's so important to be present and dah, dah, dah, dah. And I've always, I think from childhood, I've always lived in the future. Like, I've always lived in the future, which has made life relatively frustrating for me, as you can imagine, um, so I'm just now in the space where, yes, I can have the vision for the future, but right now is what matters.

Loree Phillip:

Yes. Have you heard the saying, and I don't know where this came from, um, but the present moment is a gift and that's why they call it present. It's a present. Yeah. Yes. I always loved that one.

Sabine:

Thank you for that reminder. And then of course, you know, for those who are listening, who want to connect with you, get in touch, learn more about your podcast and your programs, share with us what you do, how they can get in touch with you, what you have going on.

Loree Phillip:

Yeah, thank you so much for that, Sabine. I've really enjoyed this conversation. I would love for your listeners to check out my podcast. It's called Daring to Leap. You can find it wherever you're listening to this right now. You can find it there. And, um, I just launched a video version of the podcast. Um, it's Daring to Leap TV and you can find it on, um, Amazon. Fire TV, Roku TV, under the Bravehearts TV network app. And so that's, that's the podcast side of things. I'd love for you to connect with me on LinkedIn and you can learn more there, um, at Lori Phillip, P H I L L I P, um, about connect with me and learn more about all the things I'm up to.

Sabine:

Awesome. Thank you. And please check out the podcast because yours truly on it. Well, Lori, thank you. I could talk to you for hours. Um, as always, thank you so much for coming on, sharing your wisdom and also, you know, being very vulnerable, um, in your, in your journey to uncovering and really tapping into and owning your power. I sincerely

Loree Phillip:

appreciate it. Absolutely. It's been an honor to be with you Sabine. And I, I can't wait for people to see your episode on my, on my show. It's going to be, it was a good one.

Sabine:

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. All right. Well, with that. We will be back next week with another female powerhouse until then have a great rest of the week. Take care. And we will talk soon.

Hope you enjoyed this week's episode. If you found today's conversation helpful or got a piece of insight that you plan to implement in your life, I'd love to hear from you. Connect with me on LinkedIn at Sabine Gideon and send me a message, or feel free to leave a review on either Apple or Spotify. I also invite you to share this episode with anyone in your network, another powerhouse, possibly. Who you think might benefit from today's conversation. Lastly, as always, any links, any resources, or any upcoming training is included in the show notes. So be sure to check that before you leave today. Until we chat again, have a blessed and powerful week.

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